First of all, I should warn you … this post contains some swear words (cover your eyes if they offend!)
We’re always told in internet marketing that the first things you need to do are:
- find a niche
- get a domain
- get hosting
- build a website
but that’s just plain WRONG!
Even if you have all of those things (and believe me I do 🙂 ) it doesn’t mean that you are on the right track to achieving your goal. There is still one more “secret ingredient” that you must have…. and no I don’t mean traffic 🙂
It’s quite simple
You need to have your head screwed on properly 🙂
Here’s what I mean
Usually, when you decide to change your life and take up internet marketing you have a vision of a care free lifestyle, nice house, flash car and the ability to pick and choose your own hours while working in your jim jams (I have mine on now!) but in reality that’s not what happens …..for a while anyway.
In reality we need to work out the process of how to achieve the dream first. This is where a lot of us face obstacles. I know I did!!! I couldn’t ftp, build a site or do anything really but sit and sob some days. And it took me a long time to learn ………
Even though I know the process I still feel like I’m not getting the success that I want to achieve the dream. Ever feel like that? For instance I have a project that I really, really want to do but for the last two weeks I seem to be stuck …. I can’t seem to get started although I can see the end goal clearly. Clearly something is amiss 🙁
So I did something weird for me
Last weekend I left the bat cave 🙂 If you know me, you’ll know I rarely leave the bat cave only to go to work, shops and for my nightly stroll around the neighbourhood. I hate leaving my comfort zone and I’m permanently attached to a keyboard! But the love of my life had tickets to the Chris Howard – Breakthough to Success seminar so I thought – why not? It’s only 2 and a half days out of 365 so a small price to pay to find out what’s holding me back on my project.
I was surprised
First of all, I was surprised that the love of my life stayed awake for the entire time! He has sleep apnea which is a medical reason for why he falls asleep when we have conversations about “our relationship” – but he didn’t nod off at all 🙂 Here’s a piccy of us at the conference. I have no idea where we were sitting when this pic was taken!
What really, really shocked me was what I discovered about myself
Just so you know, I thought the whole seminar thing would be a bit airy fairy and not my cup of coffee at all. In fact, I had only planned to stay Friday night to check it out and not return for the Saturday and Sunday presentation.
The funny thing is though that you learn so much about the way you think and behave like you do that you can’t help wanting to find out more …and, of course, seeing if you can change your life. By the end, you are ready to take on the world and why not?
If you don’t know who Christopher Howard is you can watch these promo videos.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jTK5iDlY6Us http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TeC84VOPt04
A quick run down
I have a psychology degree lying around somewhere so I wasn’t really surprised at the techniques that Chris Howard uses but what did surprise me was it was the first time I had been forced to look at myself and my behaviours. I couldn’t have done that with brutal honesty without the seminar.
There’s a lot covered at the seminar (which was free) and way too much for me to include in here. This was an action packed 2 and a half days (with very few breaks!) First of all you work out what values you have, then you look at the values of others you want to model. Time is spent working through strategies that are stopping you achieving your dreams as well as some great goal setting exercises. The whole seminar is presented in such a way that you must participate and interact – which is great fun. This is a great way to get out of your comfort zone because honestly …. too often the problems we have are because we are too scared to move out of our comfort zone.
I loved the stories
Strangers can really inspire you.
There were quite a few kids at the seminar and one of them has made a big impression. One of the most inspirational people in the seminar was a young boy called Floyd. Floyd is 12 (but going on 13!) and he wanted to be a presenter just like Christopher Howard. So, Chris invited him up on stage and gave him a shot. Here was a 12 year old kid that had a dream, had just made it a reality. Here’s what Floyd had to say about the experience:
If you think you can’t do it, just do it and feel great.
Out of the mouth of babes 🙂 I don’t have children, but I kept thinking if I did I would love for them to have the benefit of this knowledge at Floyd’s age so they can achieve their dreams.
Too often we are our own worst enemy. I spend heaps of time working out why I can’t do things but guess what that energy is much better spent working out all the ways that I can do it. Hey, I’m not going to let a 12 year old beat me!
A woman called Gail got up to speak and some of you will identify with this I know.
Gail told everyone how she had taken 12 months leave from her job to do “internet marketing”. She had two websites up but “nothing was hapenning with them”.
We’ve all been there haven’t we? I know I have. I’ve spent many hours wondering what I was doing wrong, hunting around for clues and reassessing my “strategy”.
When she worked out how she spent her day it seemed quite familiar. Get up, do some work on the site, do some exercise, stare at the fluff under the couch for hours …and then watch tv 🙂
Well …. I don’t stare at the fluff under the couch but you get the point. I’ve been known to:
- clean my keyboard (that counts as work doesn’t it?)
- eat chips (my number 1 stress release food)
- rearrange my desk/office/papers
- spend aimless time on twitter, facebook, forums
The problem was when she worked out the priorities in her life and her commitment to them the comitment to internet marketing was quite low but the dream was there. It’s just an example of how we can fall in love with the concept but the actual process to get us there is not something we commit and fall in love with. The good news is that you can learn to do that.
For example, I love the concept of being the same weight I was when I was in high school. The process of going to the gym and actually getting off my butt is not something I’m so keen on 🙂 But… I’m gonna learn to love the process! And, I actually decided to INVEST IN MYSELF and join the gym.
I do this. I bet some of you do it as well. I’m the queen not only of WordPress but also excuses. Here’s some of my most often used ones:
- I can’t
- I don’t know how
- I’m too busy
- I don’t have enough money
- I don’t have enough time
What I discovered was my excuses (especially when they have been validated by someone else) are just limitations that I have been placing on myself which are stopping me from getting closer to my goals. I’ve been restricting myself – doh!
Now that I’ve thrown the excuses out the window I’m replacing them with as many reasons why I can do something. We all have the same amount of time in every day I’m just going to learn to manage mine better. There’s oodles of money in the world we just need to work out how to get a slice of it. Everything I ever wanted to learn – I can do so by finding the best people to teach me. So really, there’s no excuses.
Think of how many opportunities will open up for you if you get rid of the limitations you have placed on yourself. One of the best things that Chris (and fellow Aussie Johnny Cass) taught me over the weekend was how to bitchslap your obstacles (there’s that swear word I warned you about!)
My all time fave quote of the day was this:
It’s not the resources it’s the resourcefulness
Here’s why this means a lot to me.
A while ago I wanted to do a project but I lacked the funds for it (what a limitating excuse!) so my darling suggested we pull money out of our rainy day account. I was dead against the idea because it was a) too easy and b) it wasn’t raining. He couldn’t understand me and I couldn’t understand his reasoning.
Now I know what I wanted us to do instead.
I didn’t want us to use resources I wanted us to be resourceful with what we had. For instance, if I want to buy something today I want to be able to think of all the ways that I can raise the money to do that and do it quickly. Russell Brunson also has the same sort of idea. When he wanted to buy a house he worked out how much the repayments were and how many membership subscriptions he would need to make the payment. Resourcefulness.
At the end of the day
One of the biggest things that I learnt was to stop playing a small game. I’ve learnt to think big 🙂 All this really means is that I’m going to question my goals in play. Why can’t I achieve them earlier, why not aim for more? Nothing is stopping me only limitations that I place on myself.
What this means for you
When you are getting started with internet marketing or any endeavour the first thing you need to do is make a decision, commit to it 100%, act on it, focus on what you want, create a supportive environment and learn from the best of the best to guide you through the processes and be willing to go bigger.
I highly recommend when this gig comes to your town that you run to sign up. I cannot put into words what a difference this will make for you to achieve the life that you want.
My biggest surprise after the seminar
When you’ve been with a guy for 11 years you might think that you know them but boy can they surprise! My first shock was that he actually wanted to go to the seminar. He explained it that he just felt that he wasn’t getting anywhere and thought it might do some good and …well the tickets were free 🙂 I imagined a few hours there on Friday when he would tell me all the other household chores or things that needed to be done on the weekend rather than go to the seminar. He didn’t do that and gave up his day on the beach instead.
My darling who falls asleep at a concert (Neil Young – I would have too!), comedy night, dinner parties and any “meaningful” conversation stayed awake for the entire two and a half days. That astounded me. I fully expected to poke him in the ribs at various times and give him my fixed evil stare from time to time. That didn’t happen and wrinkles were saved 🙂
For my darling to be “into” this seminar it has to be good! Other internet marketing seminars he’s been bored, sleepy, bored – not so this time. And just so you know, he is the last person that I would have expected to go to this seminar, enjoy it and get something out of it. It’s just not his make up he would rather go to the beach, listen to music or probably work. Well, I thought I knew him ….
My next surprise was how much he retained. This is a guy that can’t remember my mobile number after 11 years, that asks me what his number is, when his families birthdays are etc. etc. You get the point 🙂 But every day he has been telling me the things that he was thinking about that happened at the seminar which he thought of during the day, he has even been working the lingo into every day conversation.
The other night when I was at work he sent me this SMS:
Babe staying home – heaps to do with ferocity will listen to the footy and hope the tigers can bitchslap the underachievers
You have to listen to Chris to find out what ferocity is but the good news is that the tigers did bitchslap their obstacles and won the game.
I’m just amazed at what a transformation has taken place in him. When I came home from work he told me that he wanted us BOTH to sign up for the full Chris Howard course.
I don’t know who this guy is but I like him 🙂
I fully expected to go to this seminar and get maybe one thing out of it. I didn’t expect that it would be the beginning of massive change but I like it 🙂